the fucked up things you get from bash.org
Women do:
- Piercings in the strangest places
- Tatoos everywhere
- Face liftings
- Cesarian Birth
- Liposuction
- Chirurgial reduction of the abdomen.
- Plucking of facial hair and eyebrows
- Depilation with hot wax
SO HOW CAN THEY DARE TO TELL YOU “IT HURTS” WHEN YOU ASK FOR SOME ANAL SEX?!?!?
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<Warmaster_Horus> But some of the stuff you can do with mayo is good
<NiTessine> Yes. Like assassinations.
<Mithran> You assassinate people with mayo?
<NiTessine> Nobody ever suspects mayo.
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<DM|Rigs> heh no body loves me
<DM|Rigs> 
<Munter> Jesus loves you!
<Sirak> Everybody else thinks you’re a cunt
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<@jamesG> You know those naruto headbands some people actually wear?
<@jamesG> I remember someone refering to them as “Pussy Deflectors”
<@jamesG> I laughed until I saw a female wearing one…
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Helrich: so i was at the diner this morning, and i was really hungry.
Helrich: i got a big plate of scrambled eggs and started eating them super fast
Helrich: when i stopped to breathe, half the plate was gone and i shouted DOMINATING!!!
Helrich: everyone in the diner stopped what they were doing and stared at me for along time until someone from across the room shouted HUMILIATION!!!
Helrich: I gotta stop playing Quake.
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LoCo643: if you masterbate to the same girl more then 10 times, it is ok to call them your girlfriend
LoCo643: its a rule
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<Bearsy> hehehe… you dont really NEED pants.. they’re just a nice thing to have
<rik0> i only have them for the pockets
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<blie> i need a new girlfriend
<blie> mine sucks
<kelseyB> yours sucks?
<kelseyB> ill take her
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(sadik): nothing gayer than 2guys and a chick
([sic]): well there’s two guys and no chick
([sic]): that’s pretty gay
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<OmegaHedgehog> Haha, a very funny thing happened to my cousin right before Christmas
<OmegaHedgehog> My cousin was watching South Park with me, something he really isn’t supposed to be doing
<OmegaHedgehog> The episode where Cartman thinks a dildo is a sports watch was on
<OmegaHedgehog> So he goes and writes down ‘dildo’ on his list to Santa
<OmegaHedgehog> His dad goes and reads it and freaks out, and goes up to ask him where he heard what a dildo was
<OmegaHedgehog> He replies with “I heard Cartman talk about it on TV. It’s something like a sports watch, right?”
<OmegaHedgehog> So his dad (my uncle) tells him it’s a chocolate chip cookie, and asks my aunt to make him some
<OmegaHedgehog> So the next day he goes to school, and here’s the best part
<OmegaHedgehog> He gets up in front of the whole class and tells them about how his mom gave him her biggest dildos and how yummy they were
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dazed: yeah my mom caught my brother jacking off to Powerpuff Girls
dazed: she didnt yell at him because she was laughing so hard
dazed: she just told everyone at his birthday party the next day
BaileD: You have the most fucked up family ever. Period.
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[tim:] fuck this game
[tim:] the more you beat it the harder it gets
[tim:] … oh god.
[tim:] that was never going to sound right.
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<sexor> I went shopping last night at like 1am. the place was empty, and this old woman, just making polite convertation, said to me: “where is everyone??”.
<sexor> I replied: “In bed, same place you and I should be!”
<sexor> Took me ten minutes to figure out why she gave me a dirty look
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9mm: I suppose Steve Irwin should have worn sunblock to protect from harmful rays.
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<ken> man, I got an F on my stupid test.
<Christopher> Think of it as -A, not F.
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<Kintai> Yes, boobs are like toy trains
<Wallaroo> ?
<Kintai> They’re meant for children, but grown men tend to end up playing with them anyway.
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<olik> Jesus was the best pirate of them all.
<olik> He walked the seven seas!
<deathfish> and got nailed to the plank instead of walking it
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<_kr4m3r> so many fucking criminals, its bullshit
<foniks`> heh, if we sent all the criminals to some empty continent and just left them there to die
<foniks`> and showed up like 50yrs later like, “sup?”
<foniks`> whatd u think they’d say?
<FoSZoR[bg]> something along the lines of, “G`Day mate”
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<bring> My mom, out of the blue
<bring> asked me if I ever thought of joining the army
<bring> and was like “I don’t approve of that, but you might like it” and I was like “approve of what?” so she was like “you know, killing people”
~~~~
anyway a lil’ freddy quote:
I used to ask my mom,
“Mom when would i find the right woman?”
she patted my head and said,
“Don’t worry about finding the right woman, concentrate on being the right man
“
MJ’s death
It was 7am in the morning when i heard news on the radio about MJ’s dead. Yes i did not sleep, insomnia i guess. Was fiddling around with my phone looking through old messages.
You know, MJ left behind so much that he wanted to do, so much he wanted to accomplish before he decides it was over.
I was never an MJ fan, i poked fun of him too for jokes sake; but i never knew how much impact it would have when he left all so sudden. No wills, no last regards, nothing.
Life really is short, i really don’t want to have any regrets; some things need time however; just wish theres enough of it.
A walk in my shoes
Headed to meet Kah Leong today at tampines mall, was suppose to watch Transformers with him but Transformer addicts pre-booked all the seats from 2pm all the way to 9pm, and KL had to work after; didn’t really manage to watch it.
We had ranmen though and well caught up on tons of stuff surrounding both our lives. Haha we were talking about random stuff when i randomly asked him;
fred: “hey have we ever quarreled before?”
kl: “erm.. ehh like.. no ah lol”
fred: “lol no right? haha after like 5 years”
kl: “haha guess we just agree with everything 
“
Hahaha bromance sia! Its hard to find a friend like that seriously.
Took the train with KL since i was gona meet Ivy and Angelina at Bugis while he had to head to his work place at liang court.
Headed to find the 2 bitches babes at Mos burger and then walked around Bugis street while they shopped for their stuff. I was kinda worried someone might ram into my left shoulder while walking; thus i walked in a rather awkward manner; like constantly alert that kind.
I had fun, lol its always fun with this 2 around. After walking for ages at Bugis *fucking* street, we headed to illuma to shop.
You know the toy catching machines at the arcade in illuma? Well ivy owned them big time. haha she was constantly dropping toy after toy, and actually dropping 2 at one go on 2 occasions. The arcade even had to give us a plastic bag to bring the soft toys home cause our hands were tied.
After that i went to try out some leather shoes, well basically i found 2 shoes that i love, and was planning to buy both (what the heck right? thats how guys do it lah. we dont really think) when both pairs i liked didnt have my size.
its was damn suay lah. ccb woops sorry moment of vulgarity slip =x
Anyway went home empty handed hah, sadded.
Angelina went to her aunts house to get her sleeping bag since she had to head to a hip hop camp the next day. (haha die loser, you’re gona come back with aches all over)
Ivy and i headed to Mac to have supper. talked awhile, before i walked her home before heading home myself.
long day i suppose-.-
haha i’m gona end this post with ivy’s dog’s blur cock look
The Soldier.
The passengers on the bus watched sympathetically as the attractive young woman with the white cane made her way carefully up the steps. She paid the driver and, using her hands to feel the location of the seats, walked down the aisle and found the seat he’d told her was empty. Then she settled in, placed her briefcase on her lap and rested her cane against her leg.
It had been a year since Susan, 34, became blind. Due to a medical misdiagnosis she had been rendered sightless, and she was suddenly thrown into a world of darkness, anger, frustration and self-pity. And all she had to cling to was her husband, Mark.
Mark was an Air Force officer and he loved Susan with all his heart. When she first lost her sight, he watched her sink into despair and was determined to help his wife gain the strength and confidence she needed to become independent again.
Finally, Susan felt ready to return to her job, but how would she get there? She used to take the bus, but was now too frightened to get around the city by herself. Mark volunteered to drive her to work each day, even though they worked at opposite ends of the city. At first, this comforted Susan, and fulfilled Mark’s need to protect his sightless wife who was so insecure about performing the slightest task.
Soon, however, Mark realized the arrangement wasn’t working. Susan is going to have to start taking the bus again, he admitted to himself. But she was still so fragile, so angry – how would she react? Just as he predicted, Susan was horrified at the idea of taking the bus again.
“I’m blind!”, she responded bitterly. “How am I supposed to know where I am going? I feel like you’re abandoning me.”
Mark’s heart broke to hear these words, but he knew what had to be done. He promised Susan that each morning and evening he would ride the bus with her, for as long as it took, until she got the hang of it. And that is exactly what happened. For two solid weeks, Mark, military uniform and all, accompanied Susan to and from work each day.
He taught her how to rely on her other senses, specifically her hearing, to determine where she was and how to adapt to her new environment. He helped her befriend the bus drivers who could watch out for her, and save her a seat.
Finally, Susan decided that she was ready to try the trip on her own. Monday morning arrived, and before she left, she threw her arms around Mark, her temporary bus-riding companion, her husband, and her best friend. Her eyes filled with tears of gratitude for his loyalty, his patience, And his love. She said good-bye, and for the first time, they went their separate ways. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday… Each day on her own went perfectly, and Susan had never felt better. She was doing it! She was going to work all by herself.
On Friday morning, Susan took the bus to work as usual. As she was paying the fare to exit the bus, the driver said, “Boy, I sure do envy you.” Susan wasn’t sure if the driver was speaking to her or not. After all, who on earth would ever envy a blind woman who had struggled just to find the courage to live for the past year? Curious, she asked the driver, “Why do you say that you envy me?”
The driver responded, “It must feel good to be taken care of and protected like you are.” Susan had no idea what the driver was talking about, and again asked, “What do you mean?”
The driver answered, “You know, every morning for the past week, a fine-looking gentleman in a military uniform has been standing across the corner watching you as you get off the bus. He makes sure you cross the street safely and he watches until you enter your office building.
Then he blows you a kiss, gives you a little salute and walks away. You are one lucky lady.” Tears of happiness poured down Susan’s cheeks. For although she couldn’t physically see him, she had always felt Mark’s presence. She was lucky, so lucky, for he had given her a gift more powerful than sight, a gift she didn’t need to see to believe – the gift of love that can bring light where there is darkness.
~~~~~~~~
just because you don’t see me around anymore, it doesn’t mean i left.
The World is just Awesome
Today i woke up early, well 11am’s consider pretty early i think.
Well i was suppose to reach SGH today by 3.45pm to get my medical checkup done by some random doctor. Luckily XH was kind enough to take off from her boring work to accompany me. She met me at the Outram MRT station at 4.45pm (it was lucky she did not exit via the other MRT exit and yes we were both very late =x)
Didn’t really have to wait for the bus as it arrived instantaneously soooo we took the shuttle bus to the nation heart centre. with some. other. (really) old aunties and uncles.
Well all seems well there, and well as usual due to swine flu, we had to head through the themal scan to see if we were running fevers.
Basically they asked us a few questions, like if we had any recent travels.
Xuan Huan replied “no” which i though was the clever answer as saying “yes” would only bring us more trouble. So i was about to praise her when she replied:
“Huh? i thought they asked me if i had any recent troubles, i thought i was a weird question.”
Almost fell off my chair when she said that-.- tsk.
Well basically being retarded to a certain extend I walked over to the counter to hand over my appointment letter, thinking i could swagger in when i was downright late by reaching at 5pm or so, obviously though unexpectedly, I was rejected as the doctor had already left and I was told to come back a week later.
Wow a trip wasted (haiz damn sian lah. SGH is no fun at all seriously). We went to the toilet before grabbing the next (instantaneous as well) shuttle bus back towards the MRT station and headed down to town.
Well once we got to town, there was nothing but food on our minds. Haha basically mine; as i was rather famished. We were talking about heading to Cineleisure for our lunch as it has the most concentration of eateries.
I was telling XH about KFC and my little craving for it; then i realised something. I have totally wiped out memories that Cineleisure had KFC. Infact i forgot that cineleisure had any fast food at all. Thats how fucked up my mind is of that place, if you catch my drift.
Well in the end we decided Pastamania was the prefered choice after countless talks about fast food :X (what a waste of saliva!)
I had turkey and bacon while XH had like creamy chicken, topped with a large Ice Lemon Tea. It was a pretty satisfying meal since i haven’t really had anything other then rice grains for 2 weeks.
After the meal we headed to Collage to check up some of their clothes, and yes Vionna, Tattoo dude with huge spec’s there as well *cough*
I couldn’t find anything i liked, other then the leather shoes which however were alittle overpriced. XH however took no troubles in grabbing multiple dresses and trying them on like no tomorrow. Well almost like no tomorrow.
didn’t get anything so off we went
Went towards another shop near Revoltage at Cine as I needed some plain Tees, it was nice but well I wanted to check out FOURSKIN’s Tees too before making any decisions as i rather much prefer FOURSKIN’s shirt textures.
Well we were walking down Cine when i had an urge to get a piercing; and with XH egging me on; why not eh? Thus i pierced other lope.
Only the lip piercing left hoho. Hell may the piercer be fine enough to pierce me soon (darn that sounded so gay)
Anyway we walked towards Heeren to check out some of the stores, walked around, well nothing much to see however so we headed towards FOURSKIN to check out the Tees as planned. The Tees however were almost the same price as the other store at Cine. Well I thought the other store’s Tees looked nicer and decided to get those instead.
that can wait however since we had plenty of time to spare
Walked all the way to Far East to try get myself some leather shoes to fit my cropped pants but well the shoes i got was either too pointy, or big, or well, generally ugly.
Didn’t really managed to find any shoes; and hey trying out shoe’s a big thing i must say. Never realised that i could sweat while trying them out-.- wtf is wrong with me.
Headed to the Nerd Specs shop to check out some of the specs. I had the temptation of getting another nerd spec of a different design though. haha even though i had 2 of it at home already. Finally fought of the temptation though (i can always come back another time) after fidling with the specs for years.
We headed back to Cineleisure to get the plain Tees (well the plain Tees there looks more high class then FOURSKIN after all), but well we were wrong. The cutting of the Tees literally sucked.
Wanted to catch a movie but the timing for GOGFP was pretty bad. Thus we abandoned the idea and headed back to FOURSKIN to get my Tees.
I got the Tees and was heading out when i saw Jesslyn. Havent seen her for ages man. Miss her nuts. chatted alittle before heading off.
Well we walked towards the Ion’s direction (saw shihui on the way though). well the stupid thing is that we were walking towards Ion because i forgot where the direction Plaza Sing was suppose to be. So well i actually led XH the wrong direction. sorry-.-
Headed back and walked towards Douby Ghaut, and well walked passed it since i was still rather early and Plaza Sing had nothing anyway. Headed to The Cathay for a toilet break (and saw Mark with his weird unique hairdo as usual). Headed out to be approached by free Red Bull giving personels.
Headed all the way to Raffles and well rested at the fountain till they started to chase us out. Haha and well basically we had no idea how to get out as all the exits were blocked. Lucky there was a china guy that was able to help us. I feel the love for cheenas now.
Well basically hopped on the train and headed home (haha yes its 5am in the morning and im kinda bored with the details haha soo nights!)
TCP potluck/steamboat
took this picture from fervyn’s blog cause i look businessy in it =x
On saturday i was let out of my cage, oh wait i meant home; after a week of enslavement due to my medical condition. It was… well… AWESOME!! muahahahahaa
Well basically Sean and Kenneth were suppose to come fetch me at my house but i was pretty sick of staying at home and thought it would be better if i took a little walk.
Thus i went to find Vionna at her work place in pasir ris instead. Well i WAS suppose to meet her but her jackass boss/friend/some girl gave her sucky directions which in turn gave me sucky directions. I was basically confused beyond confused and while still in a dazed state, being confused was no fun at all.
Well in the end i went to Downtown East to wait for Vionna and her father, while Vionna’s father fetches us to Brian’s house.
We got terribly lost. hahahahaa. well finally we managed to get there after consulting numerous individuals like sean, chin teck, brian.
We managed to reach there before the rest and brian’s family was kind enough to let us in first while waiting for brian and the rest to arrive.
We ate alittle of the Shepard’s Pie that Vionna made while waiting since we were both god damn hungry.
Well after awhile the rest started to arrive, and the food started to arrive. I was waiting for someone to initate the devouring of food actually. So when someone actually did it, i was stoked to the max.
Well ate mostly the chicken and rice and some others while i stare in envy as the rest ate seafood. darn you stitches. curses!!
hahaha we sang Karaok after the meal though and and well after some time most left while a few of us prepared to sleep.
Well yeah right. Prepare my ass.
LOL. The guys were like playing some game where the loser does situps and pumping. haha looks exhausting man. lol!
XH and i however chose a quieter approached. we chatted.
and while everyone was asleep. we chatted.
haha cause well basically i stink and i dont really want to waste the night away since i’m heading to my grandfather’s house the next day. Planning to burn the afternoon away sleeping anyway.
Sooo we chatted all the way till 7am, well after which XH headed back to sleep while and i left with chin teck, roy and jun.
took the train home. haha pretty satisfying. headed home and slept for awhile before waking up, taking the car to my grandfather’s house and sleeping some more.
my O’level dream
i woke up today at 6am thinking i had an O’level exam and was about to rush to get myself bathed when i realised that i’ve already graduated for years.
I dreamt that Springfield secondary’s pants were changed to army cargo pants and was actually pretty excited to try it on to see how different it looks.
I even dreamt i had breakfast.
Guess its some fight between the grown up fred and his other immature side who doesn’t really wanna grow up.
I’d be ok
Alot of people have been wondering how i’m feeling now after the previous post.
I’m safe to say that i’m fine, numb, but fine.
Ever tried cliff diving? You’re jumping off huge rocky surfaces with no harness. With only faith in mind, and preparation from your previous mock jumps, you set forth to leap. The only way you would be able to survive is to enter limbs first into the water. Fall down splat and you’re dead via the impact of the water. Fall short and you’ll plummet into the jagged rocks below.
What could you do? Just jump lor. What else right?
If you dont try, you’ll never know. If you survive, come back for seconds. You’re always welcomed to, but if u died upon the leap of faith. Hey at least you tried.
anyway i would like to complain that my ass hurts after being home and sitting for the past like week? I needa shop before the GSS ends man.
grrr... i think i have in mind who to ask to accompany me hoho.
PS: man i have tons of work to do. So many design competitions, so little time. So many pictures to take and to edit. So little time to start thinking of business ideas before entering army. So little time to train myself up before army, muay thai, earning big $$.
i shall not procrastinate! Like the say goes:
Procrastination is like masturbation, it feels great while doing it but at the end you realise you’re only fucking yourself.
tata gotta go kick myself in the ass before i procrastinate even more!!
